when couponing gets REAL

Today's blog reading music is absurd. It fits my mood today.



nothing about this song is okay.

Today's couponing post was supposed to be about the concept of overage. Have you ever seen a feature on the local news when they follow a crazy coupon lady around the grocery store and she buys an entire cartful of groceries for like .98? These women are not magical. They are just exploiting opportunities to create coupon overage, ie having coupons for an item that exceed the actual value of the item, thereby actually paying you to take the item. If played correctly, you can use coupon overage to pay for basically the rest of your grocery bill.

I usually don't exploit coupon overage to the fullest extent, because that usually requires loading your cart up with tons of stuff you don't need like diabetes glucose meters and Ensure and unflavored gelatin and stuff. But right now there's an awesome overage at Publix I thought I'd get in on--bottles of Vitamin D for free plus $1.50 overage. Do I need 4 bottles of Vitamin D? Absolutely not. Does my Vitamin-D deficient colleague? Yes. So I feel okay about this particular overage situation.

Just like always, I planned my shopping trip meticulously. I organized all of my coupons and made my way through the store deliberately. Vitamin D, check. Strawberries and pound cake for the Ladies Party tonight, check. Sour cream, check. I made it up to the checkout with my dozen or so items, and upon seeing my stack of coupons the cashier sighed exasperatedly. He made a big show out of combing through all of the coupons and reading the fine print, moving slowly like he had giant weights tied to his arms. The person behind me in line started to tap his foot; the cashier excruciatingly picked through each coupon and scanned them one by one.

We got down to the end and I noticed one of the coupons hadn't scanned. "I hate to be like this," I ventured, "but that strawberry coupon didn't scan." The cashier looked at me like you have got to be f%&*ing kidding me and wordlessly slouched over to customer service to get the manager. "Oh, GREAT," barked the guy behind me. I could feel the redness starting to creep up my chest and into my face. The manager made her way over and pushed the coupon through. "Have a GREAT DAY!" called the cashier to me as I walked away, sarcasm dripping.

I HATE when this happens. I hate being made to feel like I'm doing something wrong just for using coupons completely within the coupon policy. I just tried to keep the blush out of my face and ignore the irritation of the people behind me in line. I mean, after all, I'm getting nearly $40 worth of groceries for less than $2 plus tax...



click the picture to see it bigger

...Wait. Something was not right. I had calculated my shopping pretty carefully and was planning to have at least $3 or $4 dollars to pay before taxes. When I got to my car, I combed back through my receipt and realized that I had completely forgotten to actually put the 4 bags of frozen broccoli in my cart, despite having given the cashier about $4 worth of coupons for them. WHOOPS. Just goes to show that the irritated cashier was just going slowly to give me a hard time--if he had actually been READING them he might have noticed that I had 6 coupons for frozen vegetables but no actual frozen vegetables.

This was my reaction:



whateva whateva

And then I was off to Kroger. I usually head over to Kroger after my weekly pillaging of the sale items at Publix, because a girl's still gotta pick up milk and bread and chicken breasts and mushrooms and whatever. I was planning to fix Sarah's Cucina Bella's lighter chicken enchiladas recipe with the chicken leftover from fixing Naked in the Stacks' balsalmic chicken penne (next post: quidquid tries her hand at these two recipes), but since I was a little low on chicken I was planning to augment the recipe with some of the mushrooms Kroger had on sale for $1.50/carton.

When I got to Kroger, still a little red-faced over the Publix incident, I found that, Venuses and Cupids lament, they were out of the sale mushrooms. Oh hell naw.

I decided that, as long as I was treading outside of my comfort zone to learn about coupon overage, I might as well keep embarrassing myself. Following a tip I once read on Southern Savers, I grabbed a carton of the more expensive portobello mushrooms, marched over to Customer Service, and asked the manager if I could have them at the sale price. Done. Voila. Say what you will about the Murder Kroger, but I love shopping there.



best Kroger EVER

FINALLY, I went to CVS and snagged a toothbrush and my favorite lip balm for free. I have not yet posted to explain the magic of Extra Care Bucks, but in the mean time Jenny can explain.

WHEW. What a trying week for couponing. Thank goodness for the promise of Ladies Party tonight--I can't wait to decimate that cheapass Strawberry Shortcake with a bunch of brilliant drunk women.

Question of the day:
Have you ever felt like a tool when you used a coupon?

PS: if you want Publix to pay you to buy vitamins, check out this post on Southern Savers. Just look for the Sundown Naturals vitamins entry. Comment here if you're confused.

this week's haul + shopping special events

Today's quidquid jam:



Here's what $7 and change bought me at Publix this week!




8 cans Green Giant corn
6 Pillsbury crescent rolls
4 cans Progresso Light soup
2 cans Muir Glen organic diced tomatoes
2 loaves Coles frozen garlic bread
2 Smart Balance spreads
3 cloves garlic
1 orange
------------------------------------------
$7.23 OOP (saved $44.67)


Did we need 2 giant loaves of garlic bread and 6 cans of crescent rolls? Probably not. But I am a bread fiend and it is always nice to have such things on hand for blah nights and spontaneous dinner parties. Aaaaand they were cheap.

This week and next week, Publix is having their big Viva Italia promotion. Basically, they've got a bunch of Italian-type stuff on sale this week, and a corresponding flier with store coupons for the sale items. Included on the flier is a coupon for $5 off when you buy 20 participating sale items.

Sound complicated? It is...kind of. I think part of the reason they make some of these promotions so complicated is to increase the chances that you will mess it up somehow and buy a bunch of stuff and not get the savings you're supposed to. But this isn't rocket science! Here are a few tips for navigating special sales events:

Plan! When you're dealing with a sale, multiple coupons, and a certain number of qualifying items to buy, you have to know exactly what you expect to buy when you walk in the door. Southern Savers's weekly ads posts have an awesome feature that allows you to generate shopping lists with coupon matchups, which makes planning really simple. For promotions like Viva Italia that require you to buy a certain number of qualifying items, it's good to have a few alternates/backup plans in case some of the items you're after are out of stock.

Organize the coupons you'll be using before you go. It is such a pain in the ass to juggle a huge stack of coupons while you try to find all the items on your list. I like to fold my shopping list in half and tuck my coupons into it. I organize my coupons in the order the items appear on the list so I know where everything is. This comes in handy when it's time to

Shop carefully. As you go through your list, pull your coupons for each item as you put it in your cart. Double check: is the coupon valid for the item you're getting? Is the item valid for the promotion you're doing? Is it marked with the price you were expecting? Are there as many items in stock as you need? As I place each item in the cart, I separate the coupon(s) I will be using for that item from the stack so I can keep track of what to give to the cashier and what to stick in my purse to take home and return to the coupon box.

Make your green bags do double duty. It is really frustrating to have to keep track of all 20 (or more!) of the qualifying items in your cart. Use your green bags to separate the qualifying items from the rest of the stuff in your cart--count 5 or 10 items into each bag. This way you'll be able to verify that you bought enough qualifying items at a glance.

Be your cashier's BFF. Being a cashier at a grocery store is not a super fun and rewarding job, so you have to kind of sympathize with cashiers that are less than enthused about your stack of coupons. When you roll up to the checkout with a huge stack of coupons, there are a few things you can do to make your cashier's life easier. Say hi and smile. Tell them that you've got some coupons when you start putting groceries on the belt, not after they've given you the total. If you're doing a promotion with a certain number of qualifying items, point it out to them before they start scanning. Group the qualifying items in bunches of 5 so they are easier to count. If you're expecting a certain discount (like $5 off when you buy 20), keep your eyes peeled. Look at your receipt before you walk away. Did you get what you were expecting? If you didn't, or if your cashier is rude or weird about your coupons, don't hesitate to head over to customer service.

Publix's Viva Italia sale is running through the beginning of March, so you can try your hand at the madness yourself! Hot tip: the Muir Glen tomatoes (free after coupons) and the Green Giant canned veggies (.14 after coupons) are the best values in the promotion.

coupons--my organization system + this week's haul

This is what $12 bought me last night at CVS and Publix:



Here's the rundown, in case anyone is interested:

CVS:
2 Glade candles
2 bottles Crest Pro Health enamel rinse
1 bag of Reese's cups
---------------------------------------
TOTAL for 5 items: $1.69 after coupons (saved $33.27)

Publix:
4 bags Birdseye frozen vegetables
2 bags Birdseye frozen dinners for two (pasta, meat, veggies, sauce)
2 bottles Ken's teriyaki marinade
2 4-packs of Fiber One Yoplait
1 bag Goodlife cat food
1 box Ziploc freezer bags
1 Healthy Choice Fresh Mixers lunch (pasta and sauce)
1 can Blue Diamond wasabi almonds (not pictured)
----------------------------------------------------
TOTAL for 14 items: $9.97 after coupons (saved $37.56)


My friends/family/colleagues who tease me about couponing often inform me with a certain degree of smugness in their voice that they don't use coupons because coupons are only for Cheez Wiz and Froot Loops and other such processed garbage. I wanted to make this post to show that I am able to buy household goods and healthy food for my little family for a tiny fraction of the normal retail price using coupons. I mean, it's not Whole Foods organic whatever whatever, but frozen veggies and yogurt and almonds are also not Cheez Wiz and Froot Loops. More importantly, we save tons on health/beauty/home stuff like mouthwash and ziploc bags and stuff, which we're going to end up buying regardless. Money is really tight around here and couponing is a great way to free up a little cash in the monthly budget. Can you detect a certain degree of smugness in my voice?



The person who should really be feeling smug is the amazing Jenny at Southern Savers. She takes all of the guesswork out of coupon shopping. Every week, Jenny posts the new weekly ads for CVS, Publix, Kroger, and Target, along with a bunch of other grocery stores we don't have in Atlanta. Along with all of the sale items and their prices, Jenny lists all relevant coupons for that item and the date for each coupon.

Because of Jenny's awesomeness, I don't even have to clip coupons on Sunday anymore! I just keep all of my coupon packets binder-clipped together by week in this magazine holder:



and then I clip what I need when I need it using the coupon match-ups on Southern Savers! It saves me sooooo much time not to have to clip every single coupon and sort it.

Once upon a time I did clip every single coupon and sort it. I made a box for the coupons out of an empty envelope box that I liberated from work and then actually Mod Podged expired coupons onto. I really can't explain why I do the things I do.



Luckily, the old coupon box has not become obsolete at all. I still use it to organize all of my loose coupons, like ones I clipped and didn't end up using, coupons I grab out of the magic blinking boxes at the store, coupons that come in the mail, etc.



I created a rather elaborate organization system involving envelopes and color-coded post-it flags. I go through periodically and purge the expired coupons.



I made the divider out of scrapbook paper and a cardboard six-pack container.

This is all very silly but my organization system really cuts down on the amount of time I have to spend coordinating my grocery store visits every week. It took a little investment of time in the beginning to figure everything out and get into the groove of things, but it was totally worth it.


And as long as we're talking about coupons/bargains/my being a cheapskate, I had a totally lucky moment yesterday at Target. I had been coveting one of their Valentine's Day wreaths since they put it out at the beginning of January but I could not bring myself to pay $20 for it. I generally cannot bear to pay full price for anything. So I decided to hold out for the after Valentine's Day 50% off sale, knowing full well that it would almost certainly be long gone by then in its infinite cuteness.



It was still there! It might not show up very well in the picture but the wreath is all wispy faux ranunculus and it is adorable. I still kind of cringed to pay $10 for it but I was not about to gamble that it would still be around on Thursday or Friday when it goes to 75% off. But I have already definitely gotten $10 of enjoyment out of it already, whatever that means. It is exceedingly girly but Nick doesn't seem too put out over it because he is princely like that.



NEXT TIME: our trip to New Orleans for Mardi Gras!!!